Despair
by Orym Hawksong
Summary: One-Shot. Uses the characters and spells of my other HxC story The Phoenix's Raven. Pain defined him. Pain was all he felt. In that moment, Harry Potter felt true despair.


I decided to write this after going back and listening to Green Day's song 21 Guns. Its just me pouring out some feelings.

Based off the universe in my story The Phoenix's Raven. **NOT ACTUALLY A PART OF TPR.**

Pain. In that moment, it defined him. It was Harry Potter. He was not the Boy Who Lived. He was not a wizard. He was simply, pain. Voices echoed around him without meaning. Why should he care? Nothing mattered anymore. He felt the hands of people offering him their condolences as he simply nodded. He was numb to everything, the world, voices, everything. Everything except for the excruciating fact that he had failed. His world had come crashing down. One simple fact ate at his very sanity.

Cho Chang was dead.

"Mate… I'm so sorry," choked Ron as he pulled his best friend into a hug. Harry didn't even seem to notice.

"Ron leave him be. There's nothing we can say, or do," whispered Hermione as tears ran down her cheeks. Ron stared at Harry before closing his eyes and nodding as Hermione guided him away from Harry.

The sun glared brightly in horrible contrast to the day. The warmth of its rays failed to penetrate deeper than Harry's skin. He did not feel the gentle breeze on his skin. Nor hear the rustling of the leaves. Harry Potter would never feel again.

He watched numbly as Kai Chang sank to his knees and broke down in front of his daughter's gravestone tears streaming down his face as his wife weakly tried to restrain her own tears. Cho's brother sat next to his father with his face in his hand bawling uncontrollably.

A single crystalline tear made its way down his face as he clenched his fists so hard that his fingernails tore into the flesh of his palms. Ruby blood ran freely from his hands, as he blinked slowly praying that each time he would wake from this never-ending nightmare.

"_No! Voldemort, no! It's me you want, not her! Take me!" screamed Harry as he watched Voldemort raise his wand towards Cho from behind the cage of energy that Voldemort had managed to trap him behind._

"_Why should I, Harry Potter? You have no power over me," said Voldemort his serpentine eyes aglow with delight._

"_I'll kill you! I will fucking kill you!" yelled Harry in desperation as he threw himself at the bars only to be thrown back. He tried again and again until – _

"_Axelo Maxima."_

_ Harry watched in horror as time slowed to a grinding halt. Cho's body was thrown back into a wall with a sickening crunch. _

"_Flamma Abyssus!" roared Harry in anger as black flames erupted around Voldemort incinerating him with the full might of Hell's fury. As the cage disintegrated Harry ran to Cho's side._

"_Cho, oh god, Cho stay with me. Everything will be alright," said Harry frantically as he felt the life ebb away from her._

"_Harry, it's alright. I'm ready," said Cho as she stroked Harry's cheek, tears rolling down her face._

"_Please don't leave me Cho, I love you, we can get you back to Merlin, he'll know what to do," said Harry tears falling as well._

"_I love you to Harry, but there isn't enough time. I've accepted that this is it. Please don't blame yourself," said Cho as she pulled herself up to give Harry a kiss._

"_Cho –," started Harry after she broke the kiss before he realized that her pulse had stopped. Cho Chang was dead._

Harry blinked and realized that the sun had already set. He was alone. He sat down in front of Cho's grave as the corners of his mouth twitched upwards as he remembered all of the memories had had with Cho. Quidditch. Scotland. Cho's manor. Fighting Death Eaters. Their song. Making love for the first time. Their engagement. The smile disappeared when he realized that he would never create another one with Cho.

He picked up his wand as his eyes trailed over the grooves in the wood as he thought. What was there left for him to live for? He had killed Voldemort. He had done what he set out to do. The world was safe again, for a time. When the next dark wizard rose to power there would be new heroes to challenge him, so what point was there for him to stay? He had nothing left to tie him down. With a determined heart Harry brought the tip of his want to his temple.

"_I'm coming Cho."_

"Avada Kedavra," whispered Harry, and with a flash of green light, everything was gone.

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: Don't worry I am still working on TPR. The first chapter for Part Two is almost done. Sorry for the abysmally long wait.**

**~Orym Hawksong**


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